Why do they ask for Compensation?

2009-07-27

Wherever we see let it be in newspapers,Interviews and even blogs..we have seen lots of women's who say that they are equal to men and there should not be any gender based bias or distinction.I respect the same and I insist there should be no gender based distinction.
But do they mean what they are saying? I feel that those are mere words and they say it for pride.Why so?
Recently one of my close neighbours,who were good couples accepted to end their relationship mutually.Its their own decision.They officially lodged a divorce notice via court. But mysteriously for getting divorced,the women asked for compensation for living with that guy.She demanded 5 lakh rupees from the guy whom she lived with.What for? After all the guy too lived with the same women and is he asking any compensation for living with her? Now if women feel they are equal to men,Why do they ask for compensation after divorce?

Do men ask for any compensation? Mostly women are also earning now-a-days.So what is the necessity?Do they still feel they are the weaker sex?

Image Courtesy: http://i.ehow.com

20 comments:

  • pawan

    Interesting point!
    I guess we have to hear it all from the women itself!
    But this one sure is a though provoking question!

  • Unknown

    @pawan: I thought of writing it more powerfully... But That will become a controversy... So i kept it safe from my point of view...

  • Madman

    certainly its not fair if u look at it generally there must something personal and that we dont know and so cant comment

  • Bharathi

    Hey Shankar, you are having grudge against women. Is this because of your last love? just kidding.

    To be serious, the development of women are not well balanced all over the country. For all the ill treatment and abuses that our fore fathers had done to women, we need to accept this for a short while. :-)

  • Shilpa Garg

    I second Bharthi!! You cant generalize things based on one or two random incidents.

    Regarding, compensation...well we do not know the nitty gritties. Do we??

  • Vipul Grover

    hey shankar.. ur blog has startd generating many pop ups.. it mite drive away traffic buddy.. so do look into it!
    now as 4 ur post, 2 sum xtnt u r rite in putting up this question. the times hav changd nd laws shud also be tweaked accordingly. 2day, women mite b earning more thn their spouse, bt Indian law sumhow miss d point.
    however, i'll like 2 bring 2 ur notice the case of Madonna where she hd 2 recntly pay a big fortune 2 her husband to gt the divorce. so times hav changd indeed nd laws r also changing with it:)

  • Unknown

    @venky: its general venky..nothing personal... and this happens everywhere...its a law...

    @bharathi: no grudge against women bharathi..I like them a lot.... and regarding my past love its me who made the mistake and its me who dumped her.. I feel sorry for my x. and do you think only women are being ill treated...and no men in world? gone are the days of forefathers bharathi...

    @shilpa: compensation is law shilpa..its not one event...

    @vipul: you have a point buddy.. I put something here out of ignorance.. and you teach me something new....never new about the Madonna thing...

  • Unknown

    @vipul: pop-up is rectified i think... please do let me know if the problem has not been rectified..thanks...

  • It really does seem like you have a problem with women. Anyway, there is always compensation in divorce and generally it depends on who is earning more. Hence the Madonna situatio. Also, if there is a child involved, then the parent that receives custody will get payment from the other. In most cases, it is the woman that gets custody and that's why the man has to pay up. Again, esp in countries like India, men tend to earn more than women and so end up having to pay the woman. Courts also take into account how much has been sacrificed in a marriage (eg a woman giving up her jo for her husband to pursue his in a diff city) and offer compensation. These are generalisations and I'm sure there are men out there (not in India perhaps) that have sacrificed for their wives and in case of a divorce, they would get compensation instad.

  • kunu

    This kind of law was made to protect the house-wives.Who don't have any financial independence as they just stay at home and look after the house and kids.But if a woman is earning and is financial sound then she shouldn't ask for alimony.

  • Shilpa Garg

    Hey! Compensation is a law, I know that!
    I think my comment does not mean in any way that compensation is an event!

    I meant, based on 1 event in your neighborhood regarding divorce and compensation, you cant generalise things!

    Divorce compensation in India are basically in the form of Alimony or Permanent Maintenance on monthly or lump sum basis which the Spouse usually the wife can claim if she is unable to maintain herself as she doesn't have sufficient means to do so by way of monthly income or any property through which she can get enough amount for her livelihood.

    Do you know the reason for the compensation in your neighbours case? Is the wife working? Will she be able to support herself? That's what compensation is for. (That explains the nitty gritty part of my comment)

    And Vipul pointed out the Madonna case, while we have a case in our own land. In Orissa, a court has asked a woman to pay her husband alimony.

    Under Section 24 of the Hindu Marriage Act of 1955, it is mentioned that either wife or husband can claim alimony in case of divorce depending upon the earning status.

    U may like to check this at
    http://ibnlive.in.com/news/wife-pays-alimony-to-jobless-husband/1089-3.html

    PS: It's kind of funny, giving such a detailed explanation, but I felt the need for it!

  • Bharathi

    Sorry for disagreeing pal. (I think this is a disagreement day as I have to write another disagreeing comment to vipul in my recent post after finishing this one)

    I dont say there arent any instances of women ill treating men or women misusing law for their advantage.

    I think we are struck with only city life. There are more women living in village leading a complete dependent life. The society and culture of village also favors male chauvinism.

    Considering the above point, I woudnt suggest to change or remove this law. But taking your point into consideration, I think the law can be altered a little to review the financial status of the women involved before giving verdict.

    @shilpa: If you feel your comment is big, then I am worried about the reply I gave to Vipul in my recent post :-(

  • Vipul Grover

    yup.. pop ups gone 4 gud:)
    nd yeah shilpa has givn a nice reply about all the nitty gritty.. evn i was unaware about all this.. so mst thank her 4 these details nd b4 tht thanks to u for initiating it.. cheers:)

    Bt yeah, thr r cases cuming up where women r misusing laws which have been creatd for their protection, the most frequently misused one being pertaining 2 anti-dowry. Evn S.C. recently commented on this growing trend. for eg, (um jus saying this out of memory, not sure of details) unlike in previous cases, husband and his whole family will not b arrestd just on the basis of the cmplaint bt aftr proper invstigation.

  • Vipul Grover

    nd yeah bharathi is rite wn he says to luk at all sections of society nd not just the city dwelling middle classes. major pop is in villages nd thr social-familial relations r still similar to the past, women being highly dependnt. bt definitely, as i said earlier, laws nd their intrpretation mst b tweaked with changing times. Of late S.C. is showing lot of activism which luks promising.

  • A very controversial post :P but depends on the situation in which the lady is.. if she has kids to take care of, she must demand for compensation... if she is not working, she must but in other cases, there is no need for it.. :)

  • Unknown

    @shilpa, bharathi,Vipul: thanks guys... thanks to my nieghbour... I learnt a lot.... and vipul,thanks for those regarding dowry....Nice to see those kind of small alterations in laws....

    And I still doubt whether any couple in villages divorce? Its taking place mostly in cities..(I guess so...)

    @psych: once again I tell you i love women a lot... even my mom is a women and i love her a lot than anyone else in the world..SO no grudge against women... since the date I started blogging..I dont know why... I find many news regarding womens as such... I never knew something as compensation before my nieghbour told it to me... So I felt I can write it over here..so that I can learn more..having peoples like vipul,bharathi and shilpa around I think this is the place where we can learn....

    @shilpa: long comments are always invited...

    Thanks once again to vipul,shilpa and bharathi....
    Sorry I could not take part in the conversation as I had a date with lord venkateshwara yesterday...I was out of town...

  • Unknown

    @evanescent thoughts: the case is over..the husband accepted to pay 3lakhs as compensation and he also got the child with him now....because he loved that kid.... The women is of course working..I think she earns enough to take care of herself...

  • Unknown

    Funny enough the concept of prenuptials eludes in India - which can solve your question in the first place.

    As mentioned by evanescentthoughts it is a logical thing to do or also with a 3rd party involvement (I meant when the husband has an affair or something)

    This has to be judges case wise as there are 60% of woman are still dependent on man and sometimes gives up her career as a choice.

    Hey, I do know men who have claimed alimony from their exwifes.... now is that fair?

    Btw, allo thr..first time here... Nice blog u have here! :)

  • Unknown

    @nandhini: Thanks a lot...nandhini.... welcome to my blog...

    I just dont know both are happening a few days before... So i just wanted to post it here...and want to learn how other are reacting and infact came to know that men also asks for compensation..... stay in touch...

  • M.Ed.Counseling

    Becoz women are 'Harami' category, they want money for nothing. when they are in parents house they are dependent on parents, when they are in husband's home they are dependent on husband's salary. they want money ' NO KAAM, ONLY AARAM and GET MONEY ' also in offices they do less work more leaves and more salary. ONLY FEW WOMEN, I REALLY APPRICITE LIKE IN ONE BANK IN KARNATAKA WOMEN ARE EQULY EFFICIENT AS MEN, I AM PROUND OF THEM. But Most of women are HARAMI, means MONEY without work.

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